We have all felt negative emotions at some point in our lives: jealousy, anger, envy or resentment. The discomfort generated by these negative emotions is momentary, but the thought patterns that have generated them tend to be permanent, as is the damage we cause onto ourselves and onto others.
If we don’t put effort into trying to modify these thought patterns, we will continue to generate the same situations and bad feelings. Negative emotions imply lack of adequate behavioural choices and the presence of limited mental schemes. Negative emotions are obstacles in the way of our self-realization and wellbeing.
By understanding our negative emotions, we broaden our behavioural choices and our horizon, being able to understand ourselves better.
The key to be able to overcome our negative emotions is not trying to justify them.
Those who justify their mistakes can’t change. The main negative emotions are:
- Anger: Anger is a feeling that originates when we perceive or believe that injustice is done towards us or towards others. We see or think that someone is taking something away from us, depriving us of something or limiting us in someway.
- Grudge: Grudge or resentment is unexpressed rage; it is a form of aggressiveness without direct attacks. It is a negative emotion, as it involves discomfort and even makes us sick.
- Envy: Envy is the feeling that generates within us when we see other people have what we desire, but cannot have. These objects of desire can be physical or mental qualities, material goods, attitude or success.
- Jealousy: An emotional imbalance where a person perceives a threat or possibility of loss towards something that they consider to be their own.
If we assume and analyze all facts, we should be able to understand that we can’t live with anger. We must try to understand and empathize with the situations that generate the discomforts of anger, and avoid them.
Avoiding anger, we would eliminate resentment and aggressiveness. There would be no need for an aggressive behaviour for not understanding what generated that pain or that feeling.
Feeling envy is not assuming our limitations; rather, it means not being able to understand what we can improve and how we can evolve. It is better to apply the underlying feeling of envy in our favour by trying to visualize what we can do to improve our situation.
By achieving emotional balance, knowing our feelings and trying to manage them properly, we can avoid harming people close to us.
In the end, we should understand that we are human and generate feelings to justify our limitations. If we were able to empathize with ourselves and understand ourselves, there would be no need for bad feelings against anything or anyone.
The question is: are you willing to be a better person?